Many people look for happiness all their lives and never find it. Some people seem to never be anything BUT happy. Don't you always wonder what their secret is? How on earth they can be happy at all with bad things happening?

Well let me tell you a big secret.......
Your happiness is all up to YOU, and not anything or anybody else at ALL!
Sure, some people "make" us happy, but what happens when they're not there any more? We get depressed. Owning or buying something may make us happy too...for a while at least. But none of this lasts. People drift away and possessions lose their newness, and we look for the happiness all over again.

But there is a way to be happy almost all the time!

And it doesn't rely on people, pets or possessions. It relies on you and your mental attitude. How we think is how our life turns out. I've known many many people who whine and moan or think bad things will happen. And wham, they do. Then we have those who are determined to do things and think they will do it and, surprise surprise, they succeed. Because when we think bad will happen we'll do anything to make it happen. Same with success. How many people have you known to break up with someone because they were scared the other person was about to break their heart? If you're honest most of us have either done it or known someone who has. They were so scared of it happening they made it happen. Or the person who cheerfully goes against the odds and succeeds? There's a few of them too. The proof is all around us if we've the guts to look for it.

So how to change your way of thinking? Sorry, no quick fix here. Nothing worth having is fast and easy. It's similar to the self esteem way, as it's often linked. Work on your self esteem (how many depressed egomaniacs have you met?), and also look for the good in everything. EVERY situation. Remember that everything is meant to happen for a reason, so if your car won't start, maybe it's because you might have had an accident if it had. Or maybe being dumped is because you'd not have met your soul mate otherwise....however far away that is.

Learn to accept what is. If you can't do anything about it, there's no use worrying about it. If you can do something about it then do it, or at least make a plan for doing it.

Remember you can't control another person. Only yourself. You are responsible for your own emotions, words, thoughts, actions and reactions. You have power over who you are. Total control. If you have a bad or worrying thought, then think "Thank you, but that is not my reality. My reality is......" and think a positive thought. Example.... you're worried someone hasn't called and think "oh what if they never call!" ...then think "Thank you, but that is not my reality. My reality is that they are simply busy right now or have phone problems and they will call me when possible." The more you do it, the easier it gets.

Don't expect to be happy every minute, because there will always be things to sadden us. But remember the good things too. And if you work on you being your source of happiness, it won't rely on whether they call, or if you'll be healthy again, or if you own the latest CD.

I started to do this myself only 3 years ago, and even though I've had bad times since including deaths of people close to me, they've still been the happiest of my life - on a day-to-day basis.

All the best,

Love and Light,

Ozq
 
 

 © Susi 2001-2008